Long Distance Relationship is not a modern concept. There's an old Japanese myth of lovers who only meet once a year.
The Oldest Long Distance Relationship
In the story, a weaver named Vega (Orihime in Japanese) fell in love with a cowherd named Altair (Hikoboshi). They were so in love they forgot their duties. One of Vega's parents punished them by placing them on the opposite sides of the Milky Way. A set of magpies took pity on the lovers and formed a bridge for Vega so she could meet Altair. Then, the magpies promised to help them every 7th day of the 7th month every year.
And that's how Tanabata or that Star Festival in Japan came about.
To celebrate Tanabata, the Japanese, mostly children, would write their wishes on colorful papers. Then, they'd hang these papers on bamboo poles. During this time, it's common to see colorful bamboo poles along the streets. Japan couldn't totally agree when the 7th month is so some parts in Japan hold Tanabata in July like the one in Kanagawa, some in August like the big celebration in Sendai, and some do both.
I know that Vega and Altar's story is just a myth but myths reflect a dose of reality.
Reporting for Duty!
Sometimes lovers need to be apart to do their jobs. In the story, Vega had to weave and Altair had to herd the cows. Soldiers have to defend their country and leave their wives. Pilots and seamen have to constantly travel probably without their partners most of the time. Some lovers are in LDR because of great job opportunities but in separate places. The last one is my own story.
A friend who doesn't believe in LDR's once told me that true love couldn't bear the distance. Love always longs to be loved. The younger me would agree with this 100 percent. Then, LDR happened to me and I realized love is not black and white. It has more than 50 shades of gray. Love will bear the distance when needed. Love always longs to be loved but only by its one true lover.
Hello Love!
Unlike Vega and Altair who only have the magpies, modern couples in LDR have more means of communication. We have the internet, the phone, the post and even the telegram (if it still exists). Modern couples in LDR have higher chances of succeeding because we have more means of communication, of connecting our lives even in different places.We don't have to wait for a year to speak with our loved one.
The truth about long distance relationships is this: Distance only magnifies what you are and what you have as a couple. And this includes how you communicate with each other. In person, I talk and blabber (maybe) 5 times more than my boyfriend. Then even on Skype, on Viber, on email, on FB, on IG, I'm still like that. We're very open with each other and we can talk anything when we're together. We're still like than even we're only sharing the same cyber space. Couples who have healthy communication lines when they're together will have healthy communication even when they're apart. This applies too to couples whose communication signals are on different lines.
'Til We Meet Again
I bet Vega and Altair always look forward to the 7th day of the 7th month. It's Christmas, Valentines, Thanksgiving, birthdays, and anniversaries all rolled in one. What joy could be greater than being with someone you love? And this is how couples in LDR's feel when it's time to see each other again. It's all excitement, euphoria and all the E's you can think about. Once back in your lover's arms, it would make you think the insanity of separation.
Though my relationship is surviving the distance, it doesn't mean it will hold out for a longer time. I believe that long distance relationships should only be a temporary set-up. The word "couple" came from the Latin word copula which means a tie or a bond. Bonds that are stretched too far, break easily. Same thing with people, couples that are too far for too long, break easily. Love may bear the distance. Absence may make the heart grow fonder. But love's end will always be to be with it's lover.
For stars like Vega and Altair they are immortalized not because of their weaving and cow herding but because of their love. And for us common man, I'll quote Nicholas Sparks:
“I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough..”
To those in long distance relationships, how do you survive it?
