How Not to Have a BBQ Party in Japan

I thank God for giving me patience and understanding last Saturday.

A friend (Friend A) invited me to join a BBQ party along a river. There would be food and we can swim in the river. I've no reason to say no. I didn't ask any details thinking that everything is settled. After all, I was just a guest. 

The BBQ plan was vague. I was just instructed to go to a friend's house (Friend B) the night before the BBQ.  Her place is nearer the river. I did what was I told and that's when the "need-for-patience-and-understanding" situations begun.

Chaos the Night Before: Do not go to a BBQ Party without knowing what you're supposed to do

It was 10 pm when I arrived at Friend B's place. I was informed that we still have to shop for ingredients to make chicken sandwiches. We also have to cook rice. I don't mind making chicken sandwiches but considering the time and all the shopping, boiling and spreading, we're bound to sleep late.

Adding to my annoyance is that Friend A decided to finish the movie she's watching when I arrived. Then while shopping for food, she spent some time looking at shoes, spent more time hesitating to use plastics to put the rice in because it wasn't presentable. I put my foot down and told her, if we'll use heavy containers, she'll be the one carrying them. I don't like to carry heavy stuff if there's a way to avoid it.

We made it back at Friend B's place past 11 pm. Friend A has no sense of urgency and talked with someone on the phone. She was convincing him to join us tomorrow which she had been doing on the way back. In my head, if that person doesn't want to come, let him be. Because I really want to sleep by that time, I took control and started what need to be done while masking my irritation.

Good thing that Friend B is a jolly person so it was easy to just let things go. In the end, we slept at almost 2 am. And we have to wake up at 6. Phew!

Chaos in the Morning: Do not go to a BBQ without knowing where you're supposed to go

We woke up at 6 am, cooked the rice and prepared ourselves. Friend B and I ignored Friend A's complaints of how tired and sleepy she was. We're supposed to leave at 8 am.

Guess what? We didn't leave at 8 am. We left at 9:30 because there were two other people joining us who woke up late. I can't blame them though. They worked late the night before.

Not only we left later than the planned time but it turned out that nobody knows how to go to the actual place. Thankfully, I've been assigned in that area two years ago so I'm familiar with the transportation system. (I know I'm sounding like the superhero of this story. But this is my story and the others can tell their own if they want to be superheroes too).

We arrived at river at 11 am. In a way, I'm glad we didn't arrive earlier cause the other people  that we're supposed to meet there were also late.

Chaos at Lunch until Goodbye!: Do not go to a BBQ party without expecting boo-boos

Let me start this part by saying that the place was a disappointment. Not because it wasn't nice but because there were better rivers which are nearer. Most of us spent more than 1000 Yen for transportation one-way just to get to the place. The river was also a 15-minute walk from where we're stationed. But because we've come this far, I decided to just make the most out of it.

At this point, I shouldn't have been surprised by further delays but I am. We ate lunch at past 2 pm because the others did not bring any cooked food. If they were planning all along to cook, we should have come earlier is all I'm saying.

It was past 3 pm when we finally swam in the river. It was past 5 when everyone decided to head out but we still have to change clothes and pack things. With everyone helping, we're packed in no time except that Friend A and another lady took their own sweet time changing clothes and putting on make-up. I'm just dying to go home and I can't be patient any longer. I decided I had enough, stood up and prodded everyone to move. And that's how we've finally, finally started our way home.

Along the way, they were discussing how to get to their Japanese class at 7 pm. My thoughts were: "You should have thought about that!" In the end, they just saw the fireworks at Nishikajima. They wanted me to join but I think I had enough of chaos.


How I Could Have Avoided the BBQ CHAOS

Next time I'm going to a BBQ, I'll make sure I know the details. I'll ask where we're actually going, what we're actually doing and who are we going with. 

Had I known where we're headed, I would have suggested a nearer place.

Had I known that we're supposed to make sandwiches and cook rice, I would have gone to Friend B's place earlier. Had I known the other people planned to cook all the lunch food, I would have eaten a lot at breakfast.

Had I known that I'm going with people with no sense of time, I wouldn't have gone at all or I would have braced myself for chaos.

I'm very time-conscious even in parties. I want to have slept well before a trip, eat lunch on time, have enough time for swimming and be home early enough to rest.

I don't want to sound racist against my own race but usually, when I go out with Filipinos, I almost always get annoyed by the delays, tardiness and disorganization.

There's Always a Bright Side, Look at It!

Even if the people were disorganized and have no sense of time, they were friendly and warm. It was my first time to meet most of them in that BBQ party but they made me feel welcome and included. It felt great too to communicate again in my native language.

Also, I think that most of the people there were just exercising patience and understanding for the delays that a few have caused. They're making the most of the situation just like any how most Filipinos are. They may not have said it but I can sense it in their sighs and smiles. I know this because I also sighed and smiled the same way they did. I'm not alone with these feelings, after all. Thank God, for that!


How about you, what do you do when you're annoyed with how things go?

How to Send Money to the Philippines through GCASH

What is GCASH? 

GCASH is Globe's remittance service. You can send and receive money in and out of the Philippines. In Japan, GCASH is in partnership with Family Mart.

Why I use GCASH to send money? 

The rates are the most affordable (at least in Japan). You can send up to 100,000 JPY for only 1,350 JPY or 1,500 for Bank Transfer. These rates are lower than Western Union, JP Bank Transfers and SBI Remit.

Here's  their remittance fees:

Up to 10,000 Yen:  440 JPY
10,001- 30,000 Yen:  700JPY for money outlets and 800JPY for Bank Transfer
30,001-max amount: 1350 for money outlets and 1500 for Bank Transfer

Also, it's very convenient. You can do your transactions online at the comforts of your home. GCASH has SMS service that will notify the recipient.

GCASH also has an updated currency exchange rate so you'll know exactly how much you're sending in pesos.

For the recipients, they can receive the money in a few minutes through different banks in the country, Globe Centers in the malls and Villarica & Tambunting Pawnshops. GCASH boasts of having 18,000 outlets nationwide.

Personally, I haven't encountered any problem with GCASH's services so I'm highly recommending it.  

A. How to Open a GCASH account:

1. Register  your personal information on GCASH's website.

2. Wait for the passcode GCASH will send you through mail. You can even schedule the date and time of the delivery. 

3. Once you receive your passcode, login to GCASH website for verification. 

B. How to Send Your Remittance

1. Deposit the amount you want to send through Family Ports located at Family Mart Convenience Stores

2. Log-in to your GCASH account.

3. Find the REMITTANCE tab on the left side. 

4. Enter the recipient's information (name, address, telephone number, amount you want to send) Your account on GCASH saves the recipient's information. The next time you send money to the same person, there's no need to enter his personal information again. 

5. Click send and wait for confirmation in your email.

And that's how you send money the GCASH way!


What Remittance Service do you use? What do you like about it?

How To Go to a Fireworks Festival the Japanese Way

Summer is hanabi time. Hanabi means “to see fireworks.” The Japanese have a special way of seeing fireworks. It’s not just looking at fireworks display. For some reason, the Japanese have made fireworks watching a cultural thing.

To go hanabi in Japan,

Wear a yukata with an intricate hairstyle

One way to know if a festival is being held is when lots of people are wearing yukata and they’re headed to the same direction. A yukata is the summer equivalent of kimono but lighter and more airy. Japanese people, esp. women, love to wear them during hanabi topped with French-sounding hairstyles. They look so fashionable you’d think they’ll have a sideshow with the fireworks. I suggest wearing a yukata to make your hanabi authentically Japanese. Make sure to do your hair too!

Go to the festival venue early and reserve a place

Fireworks festivals usually start at 7 pm or as soon as the summer sun sets. But, the Japanese would insist that you have to be there early. There might be no place to sit. There could be a heavy traffic and you might miss the festival. There might be no parking space. Etc. etc. etc. I’ve never seen a more patient people than the Japanese.  Expect a crowd in a festival venue as early as 1 pm you’d think Apple is launching a new iPhone.

Bring food and don’t forget some alcohol

A festival is never complete without food in Japan. Food makes everything feel festive. If you don’t have food, you just don’t get it. Food makes hanabi a social event. Japanese use fireworks festivals to be with friends and family. Imagine a social event without food. It doesn’t feel very social at all. The alcohol is optional but it’s so common I think festival goers have a silent agreement to get drunk on hanabi.

Say, “Sugoi!” or  “Kirei” whenever fireworks explode

Sugoi (su-goy) means great while kirei (ki-rey) means beautiful. The Japanese usually use these two words in the same way that we use “Wow!” or “Amazing!” The difference is the Japanese are easy to please as a people. What may be sugoi to them may not be great to foreigners. So even if they’ve probably seen the same fireworks explosion for several years, you can still hear the audience saying “Sugoi’ and “Kirei” with breathless enthusiasm.  

Wait until the last fireworks exploded before going home

The actual fireworks display lasts for about 2 hours. I mean it. Hanabi is non-stop firework explosion for 2 hours.  A friend invented the term ‘firework fatigue,” because you’ll eventually get tired of the fireworks even if they’re beautiful.  After a few minutes, you’ll just want for the fireworks to end so you can go home. But then again, the Japanese are very patient people. They’ll stay until the very end. 

HOWEVER...

Now, I wish I could say I did all those things when I went to a fireworks festival in Kanzanji. I didn’t though.

First, I don’t have a yukata  and I don’t have the money to have my hair done.

Second, I have things to do before the festival. I can’t spare time waiting and waiting.

Third, I’m trying to save money so I ate dinner before going to the venue. And I don’t drink. I brought some popcorn and a bottle of water, though.

Fourth, hmmm… okay I think I said that a couple of times just because I got used to saying them.

Lastly, my friend and I went home after 30 minutes of firework explosion. We don’t want to be caught in traffic just like what happened to us last year in Bentenjima. Last year, we feel very “Japanes-y” so we waited for the fireworks to finish. This was a bad choice. We were trapped in the midst of a big crowd wanting to go home too. What could have been a 30-minute travel time ended up in 2 hours. We’re glad that we went home earlier than the rest of the crowd this year. Saved us lots of time!

Even if I didn’t go to the festival the Japanese way, I still enjoyed it. I’m with good company who didn’t complain about the long ride, the crowd or the popcorn. I was able to do my laundry and clean my apartment before the festival. I didn’t have to push my way through the crowd when I went home. I didn’t have fireworks fatigue. I’m happy to have gone to the festival my way.

Fireworks are beautiful in however way you want to see them. You can go all out and have the full Japanese experience of hanabi or you can just go your way. It really doesn’t matter as long as you’re enjoying yourself.

What's the last fireworks festival you've seen? 

Check out Famous Fireworks in Japan here 

Sumo Wrestling: Japanese Culture in Massive Bodies

I was part of a large crowd gathered to see massive bodies wiggle and jiggle, slam into each other and try to outdo each other’s massiveness. Big booties were bared along with man boobs.

Guess where I am? In a sumo competition! 

Search for Sumo Tickets

I’ve mentioned in my summer list how a friend wanted to see sumo on her birthday. Her wish was granted last Monday! And I really mean that it’s a wish because getting a sumo tournament ticket is hard. You see, sumo is so popular that once tickets are sold online, it just gets sold out after a day or two. We had no choice but to get up early, fall in line to get the day’s ticket hoping we’ll get one. In reality, a very kind Japanese friend did this getting up early and falling in line for us. By the time we arrive at Nagoya, we already have tickets. (Thank you, Japanese friend!)

So if you’re planning to watch sumo, better watch out for tickets online or have a very kind friend.

I only want to watch sumo because it’s very Japanese. I’m not interested in the actual sports. It’s one of those things you do just because it’s unique and rare like eating balut (eggs with a chick inside).  I only want to take pictures I can post on FB and make people say “Hey, that’s so cool.” (I’m boastful like that sometimes.)

Uber Ceremonial, Sumo is

Sumo is a great reflection of Japanese culture. I shouldn’t be surprised since it’s an authentic Japanese sport.

It was originally establish to please the Shinto gods. Even until today, the rituals done during a sumo tournament are rooted in Shinto practices. Example would be the throwing of salt of the wrestlers before competing which is symbolic of purification. The entrance of the yokuzuna is also parallel with entrance of mikoshi in festivals.

In fact, sumo is so ritualistic only a fraction of the time is spent on actual fighting. Sumo wrestlers do a lot of posturing for more than 5 minutes then they’d fight for less than 2 minutes. Even if the fight is intense, there’s still more posturing than fighting. This is very Japanese. Japan place more value on the process than the product. They’re more focused on the how than on the what. 

In Japan, they have a tea ceremony but it’s just basically tea time. They have a lot of ceremonies in schools which are almost ritualistic. They do exactly the same thing year in, year out. Only the years and faces change but not the flow of ceremonies. Don’t matter even if half of the people fall asleep. They have to stick to traditions. Even eating Japanese food feels ceremonial to me. This is the way to eat onigiri, this is the way to natto, this is the way to  whatever-food-you-want. The same with sumo. It’s is basically just like wrestling but less intense, just like karate with less moves. But what makes it different are the rituals. Very Japanese, indeed.

Most Polite Fighting Sport

Not only sumo is full of rituals, for a fighting sport, it’s actually very polite- a well-known Japanese trait. From the 20 matches I’ve seen, only 1 match showcased an aggressive player. He repeatedly hit his opponent’s face to push him out of the dohyo. And he’s a foreigner.  (He lost, though) The other players used the usual grappling or making the other person lose his balance. I don’t even think the players would hurt so badly after a match. I think I’ll hurt more from a pillow fight with my siblings.

There’s a silent rule in Japanese culture which is Do Not Be the Source of Inconvenience. Thus, everybody seems to be polite. Everybody falls in line. Drivers give way to other drivers. People try to be quiet on trains.  Bosses don’t directly tell how bad you are as an employee. Friends won’t tell you that your breath smells bad. At the extreme, people would rather suffer than ask for help. This is the kind of Japan I see and this is how I relate it to sumo: The wrestlers seem more concerned in keeping themselves inside the ring than pushing their opponent. From an observer it seems like they don’t want to hurt each other. It’s like their movements are out of defense. They don’t really like to hurt the other player. 

I remember reading a commentary how the Japan team were not aggressive enough during the World Cup in Brazil. They lost because of it. A case of politeness, I think. In fact, the top sumo wrestlers are foreigners. Ironic for a Japanese sport, isn't? Maybe because the Japanese wrestlers are not aggressive enough. Sports that require a degree of aggressiveness such as basketball and boxing are not very popular here. Maybe it has to do with that polite mentality.

One-Chance Game

The bad thing about sumo is that it’s a one-chance game. Each match only lasts for one round. So once a wrestler is out of the dohyo, that’s it! Just one fighting chance. This one-round, one-chance game seems to reflect how second chances is not in the Japanese vocabulary.

Ever heard of hara kiri? It means cutting of the belly. It’s how defeated samurais kill themselves when they’re defeated. They’d rather die than be captured by their enemies.

How about kamikaze? These are the pilots in WWII who flew their planes in the enemy camp because they were being defeated. Again, death is better than living with defeat.

At present time, Japan has one of the highest suicide rates among developing countries. Old people jump on train tracks. Unemployed people go at the  foot of Mt. Fuji to kill themselves. Ostracized and bullied students forget to breathe,( according to their parents.) The underlying similarity with these suicides is the Japanese mentality of no second chances. They think once unemployed, always unemployed. Or once bullied, always bullied. Once defeated, always defeated. No chances of recoveries.

Even in elementary schools, all students must be a winner in a simple activity. Otherwise, they’ll just cry and feel bad all day.  I don’t know what they’re crying for when they can try again next time. I don’t know why they can’t at least make sumo matches a best of three game. If I were one of the wrestlers, it would be nice to be given another chance if I got pushed out the first round. It sucks to suck and not be given a chance not to suck. Even in real life, it's more freeing to live knowing you can have another shot. 


For a more comprehensive facts on sumo, check this. 

The Best 3 Things About Japan

For the nth time, a Japanese asked me what I like most about Japan.

And for the nth time, I said, "I like the cleanliness, the safety and the order." Always in that order.

Most of the time, those who asked me would agree as I elaborate. In this occasion, I got a curious response. He said, "Do you have an OCD?"  He then explained how OCD's are very much into cleaning, ensuring safety and being organized.

I haven't been diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder although I sometimes think I might have a mild case of it. All who have seen my apartment always say my place is neat. A lot of people are surprised when I tell them I have a planner showing hourly tasks. I'm time-conscious. I like following routines, making checklists and cutting my pancakes into equal parts. So do I have an OCD? I don't know.

Whether it's because of OCD or not, I love living in Japan because...

1. Japan is clean. 

I read somewhere that the best way to check how clean the air is, is to check the color of your dried snot. It may sound disgusting but I think it's true. When I was still in the Philippines, I'd always have dark snots after taking public transportation. Here in Japan, they're always lighter even if I'd cycled on the main roads. (I'm sure you're checking your snot now.) Lighter snots mean cleaner air.

Aside from me having lighter-colored snots, I'm also comfortable using public toilets. I can even do number 2 because there's always tissue papers. And toilet bowls always flush.

On a less disgusting note, streets in Japan are free from trash and smoke-belchers. Parks are well-maintained. Rivers look swimmable and fish-able. Bus and train terminals are presentable. Even narrow dark alleys do not seem that dark. They also don't smell like urine.

2. Japan is safe.

It's only when I started living in Japan that I can safely take out my phone and wallet without fear of being robbed. I can go to the convenience store in the middle of the night without checking my back.

Once I left my iPhone at a public toilet. It was still there when I come to get it. I can visit places alone. My sole problem would be to ensure I'm taking the right train. I can leave my bicycle anywhere as long as it's parked on the right spot. (Otherwise, the bicycle police would get it.)

Even when my phone rings for tsunami and earthquake alerts, I still feel relatively safe since it also give directions to the nearest evacuation center. I could go on and on why I think Japan is safe. I'll just stop here.

I heard a story of a young man who lived in Japan for several months. On the day he returned to New York, he was mugged. He mentioned how he got so used to the safety in Japan, he forgot how unsafe other places are.

3. Japan is organized. 

Japan is heaven for me because trains and buses are on time. I also like how people stay on one side of the escalator and how people fall in line to board the bus and trains. When there's an ongoing construction, a bunch of uniformed people help traffic the roads.

I like the little bells in restaurants to call servers so I don't have to raise my hand or incline my head or even raise my voice. I also come to appreciate the calorie count of each dish in the menu.

Whenever a big festival is happening, I appreciate how the police anticipates the traffic flow easing what could be chaos. I attended a festival in Kobe where we had to walk for about an hour because the police made a circuitous route to hold the crowd. It was inconvenient for us but I had to give it to them for that smart but simple idea.

I'm impressed with how well elementary and junior high schools are coordinated to accommodate students in their areas. I even like the similar school bell sound all over Japan. (Watch an anime with a school setting and you'll hear it too)


Are my reasons for appreciating cleanliness, safety and order here because of OCD? I don't really think so. It's a simple case of appreciating something my place back home lack. I was just considering the best things in my daily life here. Cause really, who wouldn't love cleaner snots?



How about you, what's the best things about where you live? I'd love to hear it!